My Services (London Wedding Planner)& Shoot for Creme De La Bride Magazine

Greetings fair ones. I don’t talk a lot about the business element of my love for weddings.

Some of you may not know know that I am also a creative wedding planner . What does that mean? I hear you ask! It means that if you want a wedding that is as unique as your love, I’m your woman. I don’t believe in cookie cutter weddings, one size does not fit all. The beauty of a wedding is the celebration of the unique marriage the couple will embark on. I co-ordinate, style and design weddings of all types. Lavish weddings, larger celebrations and smaller intimate weddings. Couples approach me for creative guidance, trouble shooting and direction. Having an arts degree, a wealth of planning knowledge and great taste (if I do say so myself). I guide couples through to planning their perfect day and creating a beautiful memory. Talking them through venue choices and giving them a individual creative map towards planning their big day. Trouble shooting has becoming increasingly popular with couples planning their own big days who get a little stuck. Finding it difficult to find a lighting specialist, DJ or drink specialist? Looking for a venue recommendation but are fine with the rest? My trouble shooting service is happy to do the legwork service and give you a date night with your Fiancee.

I was commissioned to creatively co-ordinate/plan the cover photo-shoot for the debut issue of (Formerly Black Brides & Weddings)Creme De La Bride magazine. I named it ‘Modern Opulence and Bohemian Royalty’ shoot. Yes, it sounds just like me and if you read this blog regularly you are used to my mouthful’s! I love planning photo-shoots, they can be a lot of fun with a great team. Creating a mood board, sending out for amazing vendors and watching it come to life on the day is an amazing experience. It’s a proud feeling.

White Opulence & Bohemian Royalty black brides and weddings shoot march 2015

 Putting mood-board’s together is actually my favourite part! That’s where what in my mind gets translated into a a blue print others can actually understand. So it goes out to florists, decor specialists, hair, make-up co-ordinators, cake makers then……Baam!

creme de la bride magazine

D76V8345 (Large hallmarked)

creme de la bride studio-chi weddings photoshop hllmrkd

 Credits:

Photography : Adebayo Deru

London Wedding Planner,Styling and Co-Ordinator: Me!

Planner: SD Weddings Management

Decor: Elegance Decor

Cake: Elizabeth’s Cake Emporium

Hair: Dionne Smith Hair

Make-Up: Joy Adenuga

Model: Jennie Jenkins (Beauty by JJ)

Vintage White and Gold Wedding Decor From Events Royale

Hello hello hello!

One of the biggest requests I get on this blog is for Wedding Decor inspiration. I got particularly excited when I saw glimpses of this wedding via social media. I was beyond thrilled when Stella, Founder and Creative Director at Events Royale submitted pictures of her look.

Wedding Venue: Mercure Brandon Hotel and Spa in Warwickshire, Coventry.

Atmosphere & Guest Numbers: Sit down dinner for 220 and evening reception for an additional 100 guests.

Wedding Decor Detailed : The room featured champagne gold and ivory decor with touches of white. Alternating crystal gold candelabras and Ivory vintage lanterns were used with gold church candles. Lanterns were draped with pearls. All laid upon eye catching textured champagne gold damask table cloths and guests seated on luxurious gold chivari chairs with ivory seating pads. Romantic and decadent, the sweetheart are was accompanied by gold tables topped with floating candles, pearls and white roses. My favourite touch in this entire look as to be the white vintage birdcages that adorned the room. As if it couldn’t get more fabulous, every table was named after a gem stone.

 

If you didn’t get any of that, in layman’s terms, it looked like opulent Narnia. Truly a glistening dream come to life. Proving you don’t have to ‘pick a colour’ to have fabulous decor! It’s not everyday red and white, sometimes white and metallic ;-)

gold and white vintage wedding decor

gold and white vintage wedding decor  

  

What do you think? Share this with a bride who would adopt this look. Or can’t pick a colour. Ha!

EventsRoyale.co.uk 

0795 122 0570

 

 

Musings & Art Deco Wedding Jewellery by Petals & Stone

If you are viewing this website via browser and are a regular subscriber.  You will notice that my blog looks distinctly different! The old look was a temporary one that dragged on for waayyy too long. It did not have the look or functionality that suited my needs. To be frank, I wasn’t in love with it! But I do love this new feel. It’s a little vintage, light in hue and easy to navigate. It is a fabulous, well I think so anyway ;-)

Let me know what you think in the comment section. The posts are going to become a lot more frequent with new topics. Venue ideas, decor inspiration and more real weddings.But for now, onto crystals, sparkles and  bridal art deco wedding jewellery. I have some news to share but you shall have to wait…..

petals and stones bridal headpiece vintage bridal art deco

 

I stumbled across Petals & Stone completely by accident and would be lying if I said I remembered how. But I’m glad I did. Often wedding costume jewellry is tailored toward the illusion of real ‘bling’ with a wow factor and diamond-esque vibe. It can be a little more diffilcult to find costume jewellry that channels vintage tastes from the 20′s and the 30′s. With it’s unusual geometric shapes and duller metal finishes.

Every now and then I perk up when I see a bride featured somewhere in antique jewellry and am hopeful in anticipation of an affordable and attainable affair. Then the paragraph starts with, ‘This diamond headpiece was fashioned from a diamond brooch handed down to me from my great grandmother’. It’s at that point you just want to smack her lucky heritaged self.

petals and stones art deco bridal hair accesories

petals and stones art deco wedding accessories

I suppose that we have allowed weddings to form around a preferred template as opposed to our choice of memory creation. Brides can often spend the majority of their planning period working against comparisons. We read about ladies and their heirlooms. Or maybe it is their bigger budget. Society has has created an elitist form of occasion. Half of us will try to catch up. 35% will create a half decent copy of some Youtube or Instagram star’s wedding of freebies. Only 15% of us will dare to create our own big day and not apologise for it. Someone will ask you how your big day was and many will say it was beautifully modest or ‘sweet’ to avoid being embarassed if it doesn’t live up to another’s hype. Some of you may play down how excited you are because you cannot afford the vendors who only reveal prices after the 20th email. Some of you may say you wanted something ‘simple’ if the ring doesn’t meet a hater acquaintances expectations.  

petals and stones art deco hair pins

petals and stones gold bridal bracelet

petals and stones wedding jewellry gold bridal earrings

I dare you to be proud of your love. I dare you to choose and not have a care about what anyone else things. I dare you to decide what a bridal party looks like. 10 people, 1 maid of honour or four. I dare you to allow you wedding to be defined by you. Speech over. Moral of the story is nice earrings. 

Jewellery  by Petals and Stone

Prices start from $20

Monday Inspiration

Monday Inspiration is back and so am I?!

I hope you are all well and rested. I’m currently typing this from my IPhone as my MacBook Pro has decided it no longer wants to be friends anymore. It’s amazing what you can do on your phone!

I usually prefer to report on what’s happening in the bridal world and run my mouth about what people do wrong at weddings! Often I’m asked what I ACTUALLY like. It takes me a while to formulate my words. Despite that I know I can’t be the only person who is better at describing what they don’t like as opposed to what they do? When it comes to bridal style and my personal taste there are a couple of things you have to know.

- I’m not traditional and I don’t really like traditional either. I like design that looks organic, whimsical but with a touch of glamour.

-I don’t like dresses that look overdone, ‘perfect’ or too structured. For that same reason I would live in sandals if my family let me. I believe that comfort and ease is as part of a bridal look as the fabric that creates it. Everyone has their own style and is entitled to portray it. The detail on a dress should be incredibly done, but naturally accomplished and uniquely finished. No sweat shop like aspirations….

- I loathe bling but don’t mind well cut sparkle. Cheap looking shiny beads and shapes? No. If well done? Perhaps.

- I am not fond of Princess gowns.Simply because I don’t think of myself as a Princess. I was born a Queen ;-) I feel like a lot of girls get huge big gowns because they are told it’s the one time they can wear them. Regardless of whether they like it or not. A wedding dress has the impact the wearer decides it should make. Let’s remember that not everybody wants to be the centre of attention. Some gals are just trying to get married!

Maraxchua wedding dress

All that being said I do really really like this bigger dress! (shy face). It is a contemporary take on a traditional style. Love the pleated effect from the waist down. 

Dress by Mara Chua Bridal

 

5 Things| Wedding Guest Etiquette Gone Mad

It’s funny how some people choose your wedding day to prove that they shouldn’t have been around previously. I just don’t get it! There is always that girl or a guy who is the subject of comments on the big day. Let’s be real about this, we notice them. Why? Because a wedding is a celebration of two people, not the crazy guests who took the free food and are unaware of common manners.

 anniversary gift

Great Anniversary gift for a quirky couple created by Mei Origami Studio

1. Ostentatiously dressed guests.

Ladies, I’m all about looking correct. I take great care to ensure I am looking presentable. I represent Heaven (yes!) and spend a lot of my time with a very fine looking gentleman.I cannot afford to be looking like his friend ha! However, some people are just taking the biscuit. Why would you wear a dress with a long train to a wedding where your name is not on the invitation. Are you the devil? Why would you desire to steal somebody else’s tree and turn it’s apples into your own? It does not matter how simple the bride is, you will get your own day. Wearing white to another girls wedding? Are you trying to get yourself spiritually slapped by a questionable future? How could you be so cruel? Dream of your own day but for goodness sake don’t steal someone else’s. It’s pathetic.

To all the girls coming in ball gowns? Lets’ get one thing straight. There is only one Princess at a wedding and it’s not you. I’m really not trying to be too harsh here, but some ladies are actually allowing selfishness to ride. Your dress can be form fitting, long or reasonably shorter. But if it could pass as a bridal dress in white, please abandon it. If you have any conscience at all, don’t do it to a fellow sister. There is such a thing as ‘too much fleek’.

2. Controversial opinions.

When your not paying for anything, and when no one has asked you. Is it necessary to share your opinion? Probably not. One of the main issues that get raised by brides and a lot of grooms is their annoyance with everyone thinking their opinion on conducting a wedding/ reception is right. People will be telling you to have a certain type of food. People will be recommending every friend who has a business and get upset if you don’t go with their choice. The truth is that too many cooks don’t just spoil the broth. They burn the pot, dismantle the stove and render the kitchen a food standards investigation. There are very few opinions that truly matter in a wedding planning scenario. Eventually every tired and frustrated couple will soon accept this fact . Then you will be the goat they are avoiding.

3. Bad habits & Absent Manners.

I find it incredible that a lot of people will pick the prepartion of their friends wedding to show off their lack of common sense. Saying utter silliness like ‘well done on punching above your weight’, ouch! Or  worse ‘Wouldn’t that dress make you look fatter’. Then there’s  bridesmaids gone wild. However, that could be an entirely different blogpost. It’s always obvious who was taught table manners. The annoying guest at the table who is a nit-picker on the table and the guy in the corner who just won’t let anyone else win a pleasant debate. Then there is the social rebel on her phone whilst everyone else is attempting polite conversation. In a small wedding these bad traits are so obvious. Please remember that the other guests will inform the bride and groom of your shambolic behaviour, so be smart. On another note, there is always one couple who find it necessary to display their horniness and grind on the dance floor. No one will invite you to their anniversary because nobody wants to conduct pre mature sex education for all the kids at their event.

4. Cheapskates & Absent Car Boots

That whole gifting philosophy ‘it’s the thought that counts’? Yes, that’s true, but only if the thought is great in the first place. A bad wedding gift is misplaced currency. If you’ve recently just got married and start re-gifting your rejects to other brides and grooms. They will work it out and think that you are tight and cheap. I am extremely traditional with it comes to gift giving and there are many ways to do it. Whether you take out the couple for dinner after the big day or stuff some cash in a card( my partner’s favourite). You have to do something! It’s kind of like someone inviting you to see them journey off into the Himalayas for the journey of a lifetime. Then you turn around to the person next to you and say, ‘I didn’t realise we were supposed to donate supplies’. It’s the decent and friendly thing to do. No excuses guys, you get an invite? You know the couple? You get a gift, end off.

5. Bitter Syndrome

It is really obvious to see when a person is not happy for another. Whether your the ex, or wanted to get married first. Maybe the ugly duckling of the group has announced her engagement and you can’t even get your dead beat boyfriend to commit to signing a card together. Regardless of your unfortunate circumstances or ungrateful outlook, learn to be happy for another persons happiness.

I have an interesting principle when it comes to money. It doesn’t belong to me. It belongs to the creator and everyone else He created. This principle has completely changed my outlook on where I direct my efforts. I have worked out my money stretches so much further when I spend it on others. The more I gift, the more I have. The more you celebrate other people, the more you will have to celebrate in the future. Happiness is that simple. Don’t waste your heart being bitter. Oh and also, ugly feelings can never be hidden. They always surface in an unfortunate comment. Then you will definitely not be invited to the anniversary, or the baby showers,or anything at all really. Simply put, get over it.

Chi x

Find me on Instagram @studiochiweddings

5 Things: An Inventory of Organza Sashes and Fish Bowls Doesn’t Make a Decorater….

Decorators have a lot of nerve I’ll tell you that. What most decorators essentially do is take your budget, look at their inventory and decide what you should get. Good decorators (provided your expectations are reasonable) is take your ideas and produce a creative theme, translating your dream into a visual reality. So that when you look out at the guests on your big day and see your surroundings, you can say that it was better than you ever could have dreamed. That the artist took your tastes and added details that you would love but never thought of. Embellishments that tranform your space, accentuating its best features and hiding it’s flaw’s. Making sure that every element of your space looks as if it was perfectly engineered to make your colours and style look like your venue’s exact match.  Ok, its a little poetic but y’all get my dirft. This post is for all my decoraters. But wait! Grab a pen and paper, because you may have come over for a laugh, but I could be talking about you. In fact, brides and grooms take note. You are born with good taste but decent taste can be taught.

Decorators: here a five suggestions that will ensure you will stay alive after a decorating for a perfectionist. Couple’s here are 5 things that will save your venue from looking like an assorted mix from the Ikea bargain bucket. If you see any of these characteristics in a portfolio, run and never look back.

 

vintage shabby chic babies breath wedding decor

 

Image via Naomi Kenton Photography

1.  Swap traditional chair decor for Chivari chairs. Decor seating choices can make or break a space. Those traditional white chair covers in white with half dead bows…..hmm. Organza sashes may be cute for some, but unless it’s your ONLY option? Kill it ninja style. What they do in pictures is dumb down all your decor with patches of white and I promise you when people walk in to your venue, it is likely to be the first thing they see. Not the hours you spent picking charger plates and tableware. Or white chair covers just illuminate the fact that there is just nothing else in the room ha! Chivari chairs MAKE even the simplest and ratchet venues look like misplaced geography. I’ve seen it in action.

2. Can we kill it with the fishbowls? Like seriously! They work for smaller tables, but when you are dressing a table that comfortable sits 10, why does your decoration only accomodate two goldfish? Congratulation on decorating 5% of the table. Where’s the rest of it. The 95%?

3. Those two colour wedding themes. I cannot deal with this level of laziness. Those white and pink, white and red, white and blue colour situations. It’s called a theme for a reason. Picking one colour and teaming it with white isn’t working, that’s just glorified dominoes. The couple like bright colours and prefer orange, great. Team that with some awesome yellows and greens. If they are super simple and don’t want any extra colours, mix it up with textures so it doesn’t look like a children’s party. If you play your cards right, you might actually have a decent portfolio.

4. Bling it? Wring it! I’m not a bling kind of girl. I like fields and grass. Rustic gold and patterns.However, I do appreciate it done right and a childhood of dancing at events with scattered lack lustre yellowish crystals and tacky looking lighting ruined it quicktime. If your going to do an all out flashy affair grab a decorater who can pick glassware and sparkles that actually match. Just so it’s not 70′s neon in one corner and Elsa’s blue Frozen in the other.

5. Decorators, stop creating the same thing! It’s not everyday red and green. Sometimes it’s not Christmas and you need to look at the rest of the rainbow. Every couple deserves a day that is unique to them. When you are happy collect money, be as happy to create beautiful memories. Emphasis on beautiful. Their love is free and is envitably going to make them wonderful memories. But we know that love is not your currency.Create value for money.

Your welcome as always…

x Chi x

Why ‘White’ Wedding Venues & ‘Black’ Wedding Venues are not the same thing…

Just so you know, I have worked with couples of all race’s. I love diversity but the wedding industry does not! Fact. If you read my blog regularly, you will already know that I am brutally honest. I don’t beat around the bush. Life is too short and I have a toothache. I already know that there are going to be some slightly less aware people who have read this title and presumed I’m a racist or sparking unnecesary issues and upseting the peace.  All I’m going to say is that people said the same thing about Martin Luther King Jr.  I may not have a dream right now or the power to prevent racial issues. But I wave my wand and flowers appear and organza sashes dissappear!

I take issue with the fact that my Caucasian clients have 10x more choice of wedding venues than my Black clients. A very sweet lady asked me the other day why it would take a year to plan a wedding in London. Bless her, I actualy don’t blame her. Unless you know, and unless you’ve tried? You don’t know.

I really want to name and shame venue’s but I’m going to give you all a chance to redeem yourselves. Let this be your education. Most wedding venues cater exclusively to the needs of the cultures and habits of caucasian clients and isolate black brides by default or extra pricing. The main problem is food but there are others. I just have to address thisbecause I can’t deal no more. I just can’t…

While there are few exceptions to the rule,  Black and Asian couples tend to have differentrequirements of their venues than their Caucasian counterparts.

1. Food. Has it ever occured to you that not every British couple would like to eat English food at their wedding? While I love a bit of bangers and mash and a good old Sunday roast, I am Nigerian. My parents brought me up on a Nigerian diet, not an English one.  I like Akara and custard, egusi soup and pounded yam. Yes, I was born in this country and no that does not make me any less Nigerian. I am as British as I am Nigerian. I like country estates, vintage books and lots of tea and biscuits. I can talk about social responsibility and the change of societal issues discussed in literature from the 1880′s to present day. I read books AND I wear lipstick baby! Like every bride, I should one day be able to have the kind of food that reflects my taste at my wedding. That is what every bride would want. No one is saying that wedding venues should have their chefs travel around the world and learn every dish. But let’s bear in mind that the majority of venues only allow you to use their preferred catering suppliers. I just find it incredible that the majority of venues don’t have a preferred supplier that is African! If they do (the 5%), you are shortlisted to one choice. And the one choice tends to have mushy Jollof rice and dry assorted meat. If your lucky, the one preferered African or Asian supplier may be 6 countries away from your traditional cuisine and you’re supposed to be okay with that? It’s the equivalent of me saying I am providing for the needs of all European brides because I have a preffered supplier on my list who is a German chef. Like seriously? Wunderbar…

2. Black Brides have to pay extra for diversity. If you would like to have a diverse caterer at your venue. If you are lucky enough to find a beautiful wedding venue (that is not a town hall) who will allow you to do so? Prepare to pay extra. I have calculated that getting a different caterer will cost you on average of £2500 extra. Yes, £2500. Are you serious? That’s wedding dress money…and not off the rack!

3. Black Brides tend to pay more for less. The biggest  culutural market with the highest profitability rate is Asian weddings. Like most West African brides and grooms they bring in their own caterers, decoraters and suppliers. Why? They are able to deal with the larger guest numbers. They get punished for using suppliers who can do the job they need them to do. Please tell me why you can have a 150 person wedding with food included and rooms for guests to stay in for less than the amount it costs an African/Asian couple to use the same venue dry hire? Without food or decor and use the extra seats that the venue already has. Then pay extra again to use an external caterer? At this point someone needs to call in watchdog and every MI5 agent within a 5 mile radius. By the way, don’t say on the phone you are having an African or Asian wedding; it either doubles the price immediately or people get snooty and say they cater for more classic events.Yes I have actually heard this.

4. Decibel & Noise Levels. Most African brides have been driven out of London by measures put in London venues to purposefully disway us from booking. The big one being decibel and noise readers. I have no problem with ensuring that  the local community go to sleep at night. It’s just a little funny that I go to a rock event at the same venue without interruption but Bababtunde’s wife can’t make it up to the stage without talking drums cutting out the sound. Someone needs to check who is inspecting those readers.

5. Attitudes. It’s as simple as this. There are venues that are flexible. There are also venues who have strong and wrong attitudes about the kind of weddings they want on their grounds. Is it wrong to want to have the best and most beautiful events at your venue. Absolutely not. It builds brand exclusivity and is ulitimately the best advertisment you could ever want. Here’s the problem. Some wedding venues have decided that the best excludes curry or yam porridge. Class and style apparently includes a certain colour set or way of doing things. To a great extent the Asian community has been able to combat prejudice but not without throwing a lot of money at the industry. Especially with the average asian bride spending an excess of £30,000. African and Carribean brides still have a long way to go. It’s got to the stage that some of the best black owned suppliers don’t even want to work with black brides or other black owned business. In an effort to ‘up’ their prestige in the industry.

Rant over, I’m just bored of recommending the same 4 venues. 

Krispy Kreme Wedding Cake?

My brothers and sisters in sugar loving life. For all of those who thought this is was a good idea but were too ashamed to bring it up for fear of damnation. To all the men who wanted it so bad but were fearful of judgement and the look of hurt and mocking from their fiancee’s. For the brave and delicious at heart who thought they would have to bow at the throne of tradition. Your day of liberation has come!

krispy kreme wedding cake tower

Krispy Kreme have done it, officially launching their wedding cake alternative. It is not a new idea as  I have seen them bought and decked by brides & grooms before. However, it is now an official service, potentially saving you from driving from one place or another before your big day. Even though I hate to admit it, there may be some of you out there who do not (why!) like cake. This blog is a safe place for you, we love you and our hearts are still open. But if you like donuts? Bingo!

I’ve scoped out their releases regarding this and was rather surprised that the press for this hasn’t been bigger in the UK. Launching Krispy Kreme wedding cakes to the masses are a truly great alternative idea! With prices starting from £325 for a tower of 204, it is pretty affordable. I am quite literally salivating as I type….and mentally calculating how far my nearest outlet is.

They haven’t stopped there….oh no! Wedding favour ideas too!

krispy kreme wedding favours

 

If your thinking cool idea but this is just not pretty enough? Check out this pretty decor.

krispy kreme wedding cake

 

Image via WedBits

Nom, nom………nom.

#pleaseinviteme

5 Things I Don’t Want To See at Nigerian Weddings 2015

Hi everyone!

I hope that you are all well and forgiving my long absence!

Please forgive me.

So in case you don’t follow @studiochiweddings on Instagram, you missed my news!

I am now Features Editor of Black Brides and Weddings Magazine. It’s a new venture and we have a lot of World class talent involved. To be honest every now and then I have to pinch myself and remind myself this is all happening! In case you don’t know, I believe in God. It would be unfair to say that I had anything to do with this! I thank Him because He likes to give little old me things I don’t really deserve! Let’s not forget all you reading this right now. I am approaching 25,000 views and over 170 comments on this new wedding blog! Thank you for sticking around! I couldn’t have done it without you, yes YOU!

There will be two versions of this post. One for my fellow Nigerians and one for everyone else. If you are not  Nigerian, hold on but don’t get comfortable. Your day is coming soon!

photography by obi igbo traditional wedding

 Photography by ‘Photography by Obi’

1. Lack of good food.

Please note that the lack of food at Nigerian event is an oxymoron. In fact, it is an abomination.

Guys, like seriously? People take time out to celebrate you, and then there is nothing for them to eat and they are stuck in the middle of nowwhere? May God forgive you. First the food is inedible, or has gone off( Yep I’ve been there!). Then the drinks run out. I’m not even asking for supermalt just pure water! I found myself looking for water at  a wedding the other day. Talking to waiters, waitresses, planners. There was NOTHING too drink. Couldn’t wait to take my moisturised and fleeked self out of there to Mcdonalds. Just when the confusion was subsiding, you then go and really push my buttons. My girl is in Louboutins and he is in a Rolex? But you couldn’t afford food!? Shame on you. Remember the days when you would GO to weddings/parties for food. My fellow Nigerians/Nigerian appreciators those days are over. The delicious days……are over.

2. Lack of Parking

Don’t use a venue that seats 400 but has 40 car parking spaces. It doesn’t matter how far out your wedding has to be to avoid the inner city parking issues. Back in the days parking was available everywhere, now in London not so much. And believe me when I say I understand your dilemna. But don’t compromise. Your guest’s cars cannot hover in the air. Maybe in 2024 but not in 2015. They will forgive you for driving an extra thirty minutes if they aren’t regretting driving when they get there.

3. Expensive/ Ugly Aso-Ebi

For those of you unaware, it is custom for selected wedding guests to wear the same fabric sewn into individual styles. But what about if the fabric costs £100 and the tailor costs £50? If you still have to get your hair done, nails sorted, eyebrows on FLEEK and shoes and bag to match, I have a simple question for you. Are you an unlucky guest or a bridesmaid?! There are guests paying as much money to attend the wedding as the bridesmaids that are IN the wedding. Please brides, think of the pockets of your guests before you send Mama to fetch cloth from Switzerland. If not people may simply distribute funds to ASOS or Zara. Regardless, I won’t be there.

4. Decibel Counters

All council run London town halls are now fitted with decibel noise counters in the United Kingdom. If you want a free for all, noise for all please catapault yourselves to Essex. Wondering why there are less Nigerian weddings at local venues these days? When everybody is dance, dance, dancing nobody wants the music to go stop, stop, stopping! Test the music first before you get excited and book a venue. When the music stops it’s awkward for everybody, clears the dance floor and kills the mood. Major floppage.

5. Lack of Romance

Would you believe I  have gone to weddings and actually wondered if the couple is truly in love or if it was a convienient arrangement. Nobody is asking you to cry. But ahn ahn. No look of love, no little kiss, not gentle hug? You won’t touch her shoulder, she is 20 spaces away from you, camera’s are flooded with stock photo’s. ‘Aye’ is playing and boyfriends are serenading girlfriends and common dates on the dance floor. I look for the married couple and they are doing a Naija two step! Haba? Who forced you? Isn’t it supposed to be about love? Examine yourselves carefully brides 2015. There is no fire without smoke! If I was just after food, I’d call Dominoes. The deals are getting pretty serious these days!

5 Thoughts Wednesday| 5 Emotional Essentials Before Saying I do.

Wani Olatunde Nigerian Wedding photography

Wani Olatunde Photography

1. Stability

Marriage is a journey in and of itself. It has rivers, mountains, high grounds low ground, paradise’s and marsh land. Get the picture? If you are relying on it to bring the majority of your life’s stability….your wishing on sinking sand. Love is a deep felt feeling boosted by the blessing of heaven(if you choose someone who doesn’t confuse and annoy your guardian angels). Marriage like life has it’s up’s and downs. The great difference is that there is someone spiritually, traditionally, culturally and legally obligated to stand by your side. Cute.

2. Sources of Happiness or Treats.

He or she is bound to offend you. If you allow your relationship to dictate your happiness and joy? Forget having responsibilities, forget having a job and forget having impact on the world. We can’t all suffer because she left her make up smeared on the bathroom sink. The love of your life may inform your mood but should never control it and/or your actions. Strive for peace but walk in it regardless of circumstance.  So if he leaves you kill yourself? God forbid!

Do not prepare to solely rely on your future partner for treats and happy occasions. All these girls waiting to be wined and dined KMT. A Woman is treated like a queen but fully aware that she is married to a King. You will both wear a crown, make sure you are both prepare to polish them! Before he came along, did you not buy shoe and bag? My dear, he is here to sustain you by UPGRADING you. Mr, she is here to support you, not become your hot in house cash point. My brother, are you not ashamed?

Whether you intend to work or be a stay at home wife/husband ( which is also a respectable job and hard work).Make sure you are useful and productive. Only pets should smile, strut and bark for a weekly handout.

3. Support System

Accept that you become each other’s confidants but you both need advisors rooting for your marital success! If all else fails and no one listens to each other, do you have a designated peace maker? Please assign one, before your hot secretaries both male or female expand on their job descriptions at ungodly hours.

4. A Healthy Understanding of the Journey of Marriage.

It confuses me how many people will read reviews about honeymoon destinations but fail to pick up a book about marriage. You won’t talk to a Minister, you won’t talk to previously married couples, you won’t go to seminar, you won’t find out your love languages. Not that these things are a guarantee, but they are at the very least a foretaste. With close to half of marriages ending in divorce and you not having done your research? Are you like trying to become a statistic? Like seriously, major side eye. I suggest you avert your eyes from this screen and Amazon yourself a copy of ‘Married for Life’ by Stuart & Jill Briscoe. I refuse to be held responsible……

5. Be willing to accept the end of single days.

When you get married you are joined to the life of another person. Every decision needs to end with, would God be happy with this or how is this best serving my partnership? If she has to call the ends of the Earth or trawl Facebook to find your whereabouts? This is not ‘Lost’. You just failed on an epic scale. Yes Magaluf sounds like a great idea but, why chase drunken paradise with a memorable Heaven at home? Just a thought….

xo Chi xo